


Meant To Love

by charlottepriestly



Series: Music Of The Heart [3]
Category: The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, i know im so original lol, its been done a million times i know im sorry but this song is just too good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-06-06
Packaged: 2019-05-18 18:37:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14858093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charlottepriestly/pseuds/charlottepriestly
Summary: What if your destiny was chosen for you? Miranda tries to fight her fate, but she realises she can't stay away from a certain pair of doe brown eyes.Song:  Opera House by Cigarettes After Sex





	Meant To Love

**Author's Note:**

> No copyright intended. The song is not mine, and The Devil Wears Prada belongs to Lauren Weisberger and Fox Pictures, so the characters don’t belong to me!

_Oh, I was meant to love you_

_And always keep you in my life._

March 20, 1995

Miranda watched her husband across the room, silently bristling at his audacity. Really? Flirting with a waitress in the middle of a gala when he should be by her side? It was beyond humiliating, and Miranda rolled her eyes at his pettiness. He could be so childish sometimes. Most of the time. She knew he was trying to embarrass her just because she'd been working extra late recently and had been unable to attend to his egotistical whims. Why on earth had she married him in the first place? They didn't even have matching marks, so they had both gotten into this knowing they weren't meant for each other.

She had conflicted feelings about her mark. Every person was born with a small design - like a tattoo - and each individual's mark had an exact replica on another person, and if two people had paired marks, they were meant for one another. Apparently, if you got close to your soul mate, your mark began to feel warmer and warmer until eventually you found your destined love. Most people were very happy with their marks, but not Miranda. She'd lost hope of finding her mate somewhere in her early 30s, and she felt so bitter and alone that nobody - not even her husband - could make her even the slightest bit happy. Everyone around her had found their significant other with whom to spend their lives with. Everyone was happy and in love. Except for her. No matter how many people she met, not matter how much she searched, she never felt even the slightest change in temperature on the skin bellow her breast. Eventually she lost hope, hating her mark and the universe that had given it to her.

Thus, the mistake of a husband. She settled for what she could get, and acknowledged that she would probably never feel truly fulfilled and happy and loved. At least she had her girls. Her twins were barely a year old, but they had filled a void in Miranda's heart in a way she never thought possible. She was completely and utterly besotted with them, and she knew that she would move heaven and hell for them no matter what.

Irv Ravitz came up beside her, making Miranda's foul mood even worse by his mere presence. When he made a sarcastic comment about how she might want to keep _Mr Priestly_ in check, Miranda had to bite her tongue and count to ten to keep from punching him right between the eyes. She managed a smile and a forced chuckle before moving away, walking across the room towards the man that Miranda didn't love, but had to make an effort to tolerate. For the sake of her girls, at least.

When she was halfway across the room, however, she froze mid-step, her eyes widening, feeling her breath knocked out of her in a rush, leaving her gasping. Everything around her faded into the background, all she focus on was the feeling of an entirely new sensation. There, right bellow her breast, a gentle tingling that spread over all her nerve endings, making her shudder. Could this be it? Could it possibly be what she had been deprived of for so long?

Frantically, she looked around, her eyes searching for anyone who appeared as surprised and desperate and hopeful as she felt. But the room was swarming with people, and she could only see so far ahead. Making her way forward, she felt her eyes sting in utter awe when the subtle tingling became a warm caress that made her whole body feel weightless. She pushed past people, trying to make her way through the crowd as fast as possible, her eyes constantly searching the room. She could feel her heart beating in hopeful anticipation, and her mind was already rushing with unanswered questions. Was her mate feeling this too? Were they trying to get to her, as well? Had they been waiting as long as Miranda had? Had they been just as lonely?

She saw the tall glass doors leading to the garden ahead of her, and her instinct propelled her in that direction, her mark becoming warmer with every step she took, her breathing getting more rapid, her heart beating more wildly. She was almost there. Miranda pressed her fingers to her ribcage where her mark lay, her skin breaking into goose bumps as she felt the mark burn her almost painfully, but the pleasant warmth that clouded her body and senses made her want _more_.

She was almost there.

She could see into the garden now. She caught a glimpse of a figure draped in burgundy quickly moving through the shadows towards the doors, and her breath caught in her throat. Oh, Miranda didn't even need to see the woman outside to know she was the one. In that instant, Miranda was in love. The way she moved, the way the burgundy dress clung to her - _Valentino_ -, the way it flowed to the ground-

A hand suddenly grabbed her, jerking her back and pulling her from her trance. Heart still thundering, she turned to see her husband looking at her with a worry and an urgency in his eyes she had never seen before. The warmth coursing through her body was impossibly distracting, and she had to summon a herculean effort to get her mind back to the present moment and process what he was saying.

"What?" She asked, hearing how lost and dazed she sounded.

"Miranda, we don't have time for this. It's the girls. We have to go. _Now_!"

With no further explanation, he dragged her in the opposite direction, rushing them through the crowd while Miranda looked back towards the garden, trying to get a glimpse of the woman's face but failing to see even her silhouette. When she was dragged outside, the cold night air felt like a bucket of ice had been dumped on her. She barely noticed her husband pushing her into their car, her body on autopilot as her mind raced. It wasn't until they had rushed two blocks away from the gala that she managed to process what she'd experienced.

Turning away from the flashing street lights outside the window, she asked, "John, what - "

"Cara had to rush the girls to the hospital. They got a really bad fever and they couldn't breathe normally. The doctors are with them now."

More ice. More shock.

Miranda could not speak for the rest of the way to the hospital. Underneath the terrible worry she felt for her girls, there was a sense of excruciating loss, of unexplainable grief that settled like lead on Miranda's chest. Barely able to draw breath, tears rushed to her eyes and she turned away, unseeing and unmoving. Her mind began to spiral out of control, conjuring images of the unknown woman. Miranda remembered the way her heart had beat in her chest, the way her body had been draped in warmth and relief, the way every cell in her body had wanted to keep moving towards the woman in burgundy, because something inside her told her that in that woman, Miranda would find the happiness and love she had been deprived of for so long. Miranda had to close her eyes and bite her knuckle to supress a sob of despair. She'd gotten a small taste of what could be, of what she could have, only for it to be ripped from her clutching fingers. The euphoria she had felt before - the hope, the joy, the love - it all vanished, leaving her even emptier than she had ever been before.

The universe really was cruel.

_Oh, I was meant to love you,_

_I knew I loved you at first sight._

October 15th, 2006

Miranda stalked through the halls of Runway, firing instructions at Emily who struggled to keep up beside her. She was in a particularly bad mood today: Stephen had decided to have an argument last night that lasted until almost one in the morning, and the lack of rest was really getting to her. She had even less patience for incompetence than usual, and she hoped for her employees' sake that at least her coffee would be perfect today.

Suddenly, in the middle of the glass hallway, she froze, her words cutting off mid-sentence. She barely even noticed Emily almost walking into her, barely even heard the assistant's tremulously asking if Miranda was all right.

All she could focus on was the gentle tingling on her ribcage. It felt just like that night eleven years ago, when she had been so close to -

Miranda shook her head. No. It couldn't possibly be. After all this time?

She took a few tentative steps forward, and felt the tingling become more intense until she felt warmth spread from her mark all over her body. She tried to supress her quickening heartbeat, and ruthlessly shut down the hope that built up in her chest.

No. She would not allow so-called fate to dictate her life. She had more than ample proof that she was an unlovable person. A ruthless, evil bitch. And, ultimately, she needed no one. She could take care of herself. All she needed was her girls and Runway. Whoever her 'mate' was, Miranda would not give in. She would not let herself be swept into something that had no chance of succeeding. Everything in her life - everyone she held dear - eventually left. Her parents hadn't loved her, her friends had all abandoned her, every relationship she'd had had ended in loneliness and depression. Nothing ever lasted for her. Because the universe was cruel.

Straightening her shoulders, she marched forward, her determination quenching any hope she had felt before. This was who she was. This is who she was meant to be. The Dragon Lady.

She strode past the outer office, making sure to ignore the woman scrambling to stand from the second assistant's desk, and entered her lair, sitting down at her desk gracefully and taking a steadying breath.

"Emily," she called.

The flustered and confused redhead rushed in, pen and notepad in hand, looking at Miranda wearily, no doubt baffled at the editor's strange behaviour.

"Whoever that _girl_ is," Miranda said in the coolest voice she could muster, ignoring the pleasurable burning she felt on her rib cage and the way her heartbeat quickened simply by acknowledging the woman in her outer office. "Get her out. Now. I don't want to see her."

"Yes, Miranda," Emily nodded eagerly and left the dragon's lair, ushering the mystery woman out the door. Miranda kept her eyes on her desk, determined not to look.

Except her eyes seemed to have a will of her own and they rose towards the glass doors of the outer office, just in time to see a beautiful young woman turn to gaze right back at her. Wide, almond eyes looked at her in confusion and despair, pleading with her, and rose plump lips mouthed her name in a whisper of hope. Miranda couldn't take her eyes off her, absorbing it all in: the beautiful young face, the soft brown hair that fell in waves down elegant narrow shoulders, the long neck, the perfect ensemble of a long, black leather jacket, white blouse, black skirt and thigh high boots. Time seemed to stop as Miranda lost her breath, feeling like her entire world focused on the young woman, and for a moment nothing else mattered. They gazed at each other for perhaps two glorious, life-changing seconds, but before the editor could do anything Emily took the woman away, dragging her down the corridor and away from Miranda.

As soon as the young woman was out of Miranda's sight, all the warmth she had felt slowly left her, making her feel cold and empty and foolish.

She had never felt such a deep connection with anyone before. All Miranda had done was look into the woman's eyes, and she was lost.

_I've got a love for you I just can't escape,_

_All of my love for you cuts me like barbed wire._

January 20th, 2007

Never in her life had Miranda thought she would ever be in this position. Her second assistant, the talented, hard-working, intelligent, beautiful girl, was her soul mate.

Unfortunately, Miranda had grossly over-estimated her ability to go against her nature. It was like trying to force herself not to breathe. In the end, she would always end up gasping for breath. This situation was far from ideal, however. Miranda was the girl's boss, almost twice her age, and she was married. Not only that, Miranda was quite sure the girl had a boyfriend. So, really, not ideal. But how could Miranda resist? No matter how hard she had tried, she couldn't keep the girl away. Not after seeing her that day in the office three months ago. Only a week after that, Miranda was barking at Emily to contact the girl and interview her for the second assistant position. The editor was not surprised when the girl proved to be incredibly capable to do her job with an eagerness that Miranda had rarely ever seen before. In fact, Miranda could go so far as to admit that the girl reminded her of herself when she was younger, just starting to climb her way to the top of the fashion industry.

It was difficult not to gaze at the girl from time to time. Miranda tried her best to keep things completely, painfully professional between them, but she was unable to not feel that soft blanket of warmth wrap itself around her body every time the girl was near. And Miranda was definitely unable to keep herself from gazing at her every now and then. What could she do? The girl was so beautiful, her eyes so sincere, her smile so radiant. She was like nothing Miranda had ever seen before: an entirely new deity, and breath of fresh spring air in a world that constantly suffocated her.

It had barely been two months, and already Miranda's world was starting to turn completely upside down by the mere presence of Andrea Sachs in her life. Every time Stephen touched her, or kissed her, Miranda was increasingly repulsed by him. Every time Andrea smiled at her, or said her name, Miranda was increasingly in love. And heartbroken. Because, no matter what, this was the universe playing a sick joke on Miranda. She was divorced twice, married - unhappily - for the third time, with pre-pubescent twins, an entire industry laying on her shoulders and an unlovable soul that stood no chance at happiness. No matter how much she wanted to take the girl into her arms and forget about everything else, Miranda knew that they didn't stand a chance at making it work. There were too many factors playing against them.

So Miranda was completely thrown off her game when she and Andrea found themselves stuck in an elevator mid-way down the Elias Clarke building. They had been working very late, the two of them being the only ones left at the Runway offices, and in a gesture of kindness Miranda had allowed Andrea to ride the elevator down with her, since it was well past 10 pm and they both looked as exhausted as the other felt. And, because the universe enjoyed toying with Miranda oh so much, the elevator just had to break down halfway between floors.

Since it was so late, the mechanical crew had already left, and according to the call Andrea had made to reception, it would be at least an hour before someone would be able to come in and fix the elevator. It was a close call that Miranda didn't throw a fit of rage and despair, but Andrea simply smiled and made herself comfortable on the elevator floor. Miranda huffed, refusing to sink that low, but after about fifteen minutes of standing on her heels, she gave in. She took off her expensive fur Prada coat, turned it inside out and carefully laid it on the floor as far away from Andrea as possible in the confined space. Gracefully sinking down, she made herself as comfortable as she could, stretching out her legs and crossing her ankles, leaning her back against the elevator wall. Once she was settled, she looked up and caught Andrea staring at her with a small smile on her face and a fond twinkle in her eyes.

"What?" Miranda asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing," Andrea said, shrugging nonchalantly. "It's just that, even though I've known you for a few months now, it still baffles me how you do it."

"Do what, exactly?" Miranda said in a cold voice. The girl still had that smile on her face, and Miranda was beginning to feel like she was laughing at her.

"How elegant you are. You could be doing anything - walking down a staircase, drinking coffee, sitting on a dirty elevator floor - and yet you always look so royal and graceful. Meanwhile I walk around like a baby giraffe with balance issues. I have no idea how you do it." The young woman shook her head as if in disbelief, that crooked smile still on her face and her eyes looking at Miranda with a soft wonder that made Miranda's chest constrict. Her cheeks felt warm, but not because her mark was acting up due to Andrea's nearness.

Andy had to suppress the urge to get her phone out and snap a photo of the editor right then and there. Sitting regally atop her fur coat on the dirty elevator floor, _blushing_ , Miranda looked more beautiful than Andy had ever seen her. It was a perplexing sight, because in the three months Andy had worked at Runway, she had never seen Miranda blush. And, god, it was a wonderful sight to behold.

"Stop looking at me like that," Miranda snapped, crossing her arms across her chest and tilting her face away from Andy's scrutiny.

"Sorry. It's just that - well, I probably shouldn't, uh, I mean -" Andy stuttered, trying to get herself under control and watching in embarrassment as Miranda glared at her. "I'll just shut up now."

Miranda sniffed and looked away again, making sure Andrea saw her eye roll.

They stayed quiet for several moments, both trying incredibly hard to ignore their marks and their bodies and their minds. The situation really wasn't ideal. Miranda only shared close spaces with Andrea when she absolutely had no choice, and knowing that they were stuck here with this constant burning in her ribs and the warmth that insisted on spreading all over her body was making Miranda restless.

"For God's sake," she snarled. "How long did they say they were going to take?"

Andy checked her watch and tried not to let her own despair show. "Um, about fifty minutes."

Miranda sniffed indignantly, scowling at the floor between them. After a few more moments spent in silence, Andy worked up the courage to ask,

"Uh, Miranda? Can I ask you something?" Miranda grunted in response, but her slight nod gave Andy the courage to continue. "Well, um, I don't really know how to ask this, but - do you feel it too?"

Miranda head snapped towards her so fast Andy was concerned for the older woman's neck.

" _What?_ " She snarled, unable to believe Andrea had just broken their unspoken agreement to not talk about their... connection.

"Well, it's just that, I haven't found my match, and everyone says that our marks burn whenever we're close to our, um, mates. And, well, every time you're near, I can feel my mark get warm, _really_ warm, but I don't know if you feel it too or if I'm just going crazy or -"

"Stop. Babbling." Miranda said, raising a hand and rubbing her temple with the other, closing her eyes and summoning all the patience she could muster.

When Miranda opened her eyes, she saw the beautiful woman of her dreams looking down at the floor, tears filling her expressive brown eyes, and her lower lip trembling slightly before she harshly bit into it. Miranda watched, heart aching in her chest, as Andrea tried her best to blink her tears away, unable to look at the older woman.

"Sorry," Andy said, her voice only trembling slightly. "I just - I've been wondering for so long who it could be, and all my friends have already found their match, and I was really starting to lose hope until I met you. But maybe I'm imagining things, maybe I really am going crazy. I'm sorry I asked -"

"You aren't."

"What?" Andrea said, looking up at her and blinking in surprise.

"You are not imagining things." Miranda said gruffly, not quite meeting the girl's eyes. She realised that she herself had been through exactly what the young woman was going through now. Miranda knew the pain, the loneliness, the unfairness of not knowing who your match is, while everyone else seemed to be doing just fine. And Miranda simply couldn't lie to her. Not about something as important, as life changing, as this. "I feel it too."

The tears that Andy had been successfully keeping at bay finally spilled down her cheeks in a surrender of relief and joy. Her smile was tremulous but full, and Miranda felt her heart flutter at the radiance of it. "You do?" She asked, a lightness in her voice that made Miranda's heart clench.

"Yes."

"So, that night at the gala eleven years ago... You felt it then too?"

"Yes."

"What happened? It felt like we were so close, and then suddenly, the warmth disappeared. I thought my mind was playing games with me."

"I had to leave. An emergency with the twins." Miranda said, keeping all emotion from her voice and expression. But the look on Andrea's face, the peacefulness that had settled over her shoulders, the new spark in her eyes, made Miranda want to reach out to the younger woman, even though she knew she shouldn't. So she said, softly, looking deeply into brown eyes with as much sincerity as she could muster, "I did look for you, though. I did try to find you, back then. I almost did."

"Then - then why did you try to push me away? That first time I came to the interview. And why have we been avoiding fate, even though we both know that eventually - "

"No, Andrea. I don't know 'eventually'. The reason I pushed you away is because fate is cruel. The universe is cruel. And life is even more so. Don't you see? We are some sort of terrible joke for the bemusement of whatever higher powers are up there. We can't be together, Andrea. It could never work."

It broke Miranda's heart to see the expression of Andrea then. Her hope and her relief from before transformed into confusion and hurt, her pain evident in brown eyes that looked at Miranda with more and more despair as Andrea processed what Miranda had said. She might as well have slapped the younger women across the face.

"What? W-Why?"

"Because I'm married, and you have that boyfriend of yours, and I have an entire industry to run, and I'm your boss, I'm twice your age, and I have two divorces, two pre-teen daughters and a reputation that is entirely true about who I am. I'm the Dragon Lady, Andrea. A workaholic, selfish Ice Queen that can't keep anyone in her life. Not even my parents loved me enough to keep me after I turned 16.” She paused, startled that she had revealed a piece of her past that nobody else knew. She sighed, wanting this conversation to be over. “So, no, Andrea, there will be no happy ending for us."

Andy stayed silent for long, excruciating moments until Miranda eventually turned away, sure that her ruthlessness had succeeded in breaking the girl's heart and dreams, and unable to watch it all in the brown eyes she'd come to adore so much. She tried to ignore the pain in her chest, or the way her hands trembled, or the way her throat closed up as it always did before she cried.

"I don't believe you."

The whispered words made Miranda look up in confusion.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, I don't believe you. I don't believe you're unlovable. I don't believe you're just the Dragon Lady. And I sure as hell don't believe that we couldn't make it work."

It seemed Miranda's earlier words weren't enough. Miranda's lip curled in an unpleasant snarl, and she said as harshly as she could, "Silly girl, you don't know anything - "

"I know enough. I know that you love your daughters more than anything in the world. I know that you try your best to give them a good father figure, even if it means that you have to marry someone you eventually can't even tolerate. I know that your so-called workaholic personality comes from love, dedication, discipline and passion for the art that has kept you going all these years. And I know that you aren't selfish, because you are constantly looking out for people without them noticing, you donate so much of money to charity anonymously, and right now you're subconsciously trying to protect me from yourself. And I don't need nor want that protection!"

Miranda stared at her assistant, her mouth agape in shock, eyes wide in disbelief. How could this creature - this wonderful, kind, beautiful creature - possibly sound so sure about her convictions? She spoke as if she knew Miranda inside out. And now that Miranda thought about it, it completely made sense. They didn't know each other very well, personally. And yet Miranda felt as if she knew everything she needed to know about Andrea. But how could this girl possibly, truly believe that they could be happy together? Yes, there was definitely a strong attraction between them, but their love was an impossible one; most importantly because Miranda had an impossible personality. Even she couldn't stand herself sometimes. Most days she wished she could be a different person, in a different life, away from the paparazzi and the bad marriages and the constant pressures of sitting on the fashion throne. Her therapist had often tried to prescribe her anti-depressants, but Miranda stubbornly refused to take them. She had made it this far on her own; she would carry on the same way. Because that was her true destiny. Alone.

Swallowing thickly and lowering her eyes, she said, quietly, "I wish I could believe you."

Andy felt her tears return, the pain in her chest even greater than before. Not only for the tragic turn of events - she had hoped that Miranda would admit to the mark and they would start to finally act on their feelings and be together, but apparently that was never going to happen now - but because her heart broke at the expression on Miranda's face. She could see the pain, the hopelessness in blue eyes before they turned away from her. She stared at the sorrowful expression, and suddenly Miranda looked much older than Andy had ever seen her. She actually looked her age, and the way her shoulders slumped forward made her look completely broken and alone.

Unable to stand the sight, nor the pain in her chest, Andrea sat up, determined to make her way to the other side of the elevator and wrap her arms around Miranda, to kiss her furrowed brow, to somehow ease her pain and take away that terrible expression on her face.

Just as she was about to stand, the elevator jerked and then started to slowly descent. Someone had finally gotten it fixed, and Andrea was both grateful and disappointed for it. She'd wanted to say something, do anything to make Miranda see the light, but at the same time she didn't think the woman would have welcomed her comfort. She'd probably have taken it as pity, and Miranda hated pity.

Without a word, Andy stood up and walked towards the other woman, who was starting to move to get off the floor. Taking a deep breath, Andy extended her hand, waiting with bated breath to see if Miranda would accept her gesture. A peace offering. Andy watched as Miranda looked up at her in mild surprise, then down at her proffered hand, then back into her eyes. After a moment where Andy could practically see the internal battle inside Miranda's mind, the editor sighed and reached up. She took the proffered hand, her fingers gently sliding over Andrea's palm, the softness of her skin making Miranda's breath catch. Andy saw the reaction, her own heart thundering at the feel of the editor's warm skin touching her own. They hadn't had physical contact before, and it made their marks burn even more intensely than before.

Their eyes sought one another's, both able to see the surprise, the desire. Andrea's eyes shone with hope, pleading. Miranda's shone with a deep sadness that made Andy want to tear her own heart right out of her chest.

Blinking rapidly, trying to avoid more tears, Andy pulled gently, helping Miranda gracefully and gently to her feet. They stood facing each other, unable to break the contact of their hands, their bodies mere inches apart. Blue eyes asking forgiveness, brown eyes filled with agonized acceptance. Andy broke away, lowering her eyes and stepping back, her body immediately feeling desolate when Miranda's hand fell away from her own. Andy reached down, picking up Miranda's fur coat and turning it the right way out. She held it up, giving the editor a small smile of understanding when Miranda looked at her questioningly. Slowly, the older woman turned and let her assistant help her into her coat, shivering when she felt Andrea's fingertips brush the back of her neck as she adjusted the collar. She had to close her eyes to keep her composure when she felt Andrea's fingers run down her arms through the fur of her coat, and it took all her strength not to turn around and kiss the younger woman when she heard Andrea's sigh of pleasure at the softness of the fur.

"I love this coat on you. You look even more beautiful than usual." Andy said, hoping that her words wouldn't make the older woman pull away.

Instead, Miranda turned around, Andrea's hands accompanying her movement so as to remain on her forearms, caressing the delicate fur. Miranda watched the younger woman as brown eyes roamed over her figure, as if wanting to commit it to memory. When Andrea finally met her eyes, Miranda held her gaze, and saw such love and acceptance there that she felt her throat close up. Nobody had ever looked at her like this.

"Andrea," Miranda whispered, her eyelids fluttering when her eyes began to sting with the beginning of tears.

Before she could say anything else, the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Startled, they quickly stepped apart, fearful of getting caught in such an intimate moment. Burying down the feeling of loss when she felt Andrea's hands fall from her forearms, Miranda straightened her shoulders and strode away before either of them could say anything else that could break their hearts further.

_Oh, I was meant to love you_

_And always keep you in my life._

March 5th, 2007

Miranda should have seen this coming. Really, it was bound to happen sooner or later. But here, in the middle of Paris fashion week?

Stephen was more of a bastard than Miranda had given him credit for.

She clutched her robe at her chest with one hand, the other reaching up to brush away the last of her tears. She wasn't particularly heart broken over him leaving her. She felt humiliated, and lonely, and ashamed that she had failed once again to keep her family together. All she could think about were her girls, who had already suffered so much because of her inability to maintain a relationship longer than four years. She dreaded having to deal with the press when the news of her third divorce got out. They were going to be more vicious than ever.

She heard the door to her hotel room unlock, and before the person was even revealed, Miranda knew by the warm feeling at her ribcage exactly who was in the hallway outside the living room.

 _Andrea_.

The young woman walked in and froze at the sight of Miranda in just her grey robe, without any make up on, and with tear-stained eyes.

"Miranda?"

Lost, red-rimed blue eyes searched almond ones, and before Miranda knew it Andrea was striding across the room and sitting down next to her on the couch.

"What happened? Are the girls okay?"

Even in her anguish, Miranda had to supress a smile at Andrea's concern for her girls.

"That remains to be seen."

"What - "

"Stephen isn't coming tomorrow."

Andrea sat quietly for a moment before she put her bag down and turned sideways on the couch, facing Miranda and waiting.

"He just asked me for a divorce," Miranda said, looking away when she felt tears stinging her eyes.

"Oh," Andrea said, reeling back slightly, as if surprised. Miranda almost snorted in amusement, because she had definitely seen this coming for a while now. "I'm so sorry, Miranda."

"I don't care about the divorce itself. I don't even have the energy to care that I've failed once again. The only thing that breaks my heart is how Cassidy and Caroline are going to take this. My girls... they deserve so much better." She tried to cover up the way her voice broke with a cough, but the way Andrea's eyes shone with sympathy and something else told Miranda that her assistant was very aware Miranda was on the verge of crying.

Without a word, Andy scooted closer towards the broken woman until their outer thighs were touching. Taking a leap of faith, Andy opened her arms and wrapped them around the other woman. Miranda immediately froze, her body tensing up to such an extent that Andrea felt like she was hugging a statue.

"It's okay. Just try to relax, okay?"

Miranda wanted to push her away, to complain, to scream, but the truth was that as soon as Andrea had wrapped her in this warm embrace, Miranda was unable to think about anything else but her touch. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths, trying to calm her racing heart and the all-consuming desire to hold her Andrea and never let go. Her mark was burning hotter than ever before, and Miranda felt her body's response. Everything inside her told her to return the embrace, to finally give in and make her soul mate **_hers_**. But Miranda's mind was stubborn and determined, so all she did was try to calm her breathing and relax every muscle in her body.

"There, that's it." Andrea murmured, and Miranda gave a little sigh as she leaned into the younger woman.

After several long moments of taking comfort in Andrea's soft embrace, Miranda pulled away, and Andrea let her arms fall to her sides.

"Is there anything else I can do?" Andrea said tentatively, her eyes shining with warmth and compassion and such eagerness to help that Miranda was forced to look away before she kissed her.

"Yes. Your job."

Andrea flinched, and the hurt expression that took over her features tore at Miranda's heart, but she knew this was the only way to set boundaries before either of them lost control.

"That's all," Miranda said, waving her hand dismissively and looking away. Digging the knife just slightly deeper.

As soon as she heard the front door of the suite close behind Andrea, Miranda buried her face in her hands and let the tears fall once again.

.....-.....

The next day, Andrea walked away. Miranda turned to give her some instructions, only to find her gone. She finally saw her crossing the street away from her, never looking back. Her heart sunk painfully, and a ringing began in her ears. She could feel nausea turning her stomach unpleasantly, and a sharp pain in her chest told Miranda that she was having a panic attack. She tried to even her breathing as she blindly moved forward through the paparazzi, but the flashes and shouts surrounding her and the rapid beating of her heart made it difficult to catch her breath. Im a daze, she made it inside and immediately spotted Nigel. Feeling even more guilt at the sight of him, she approached her old friend with a tight knot in her throat.

"I'm going back to the hotel. Take over for me while I'm away." She managed to say, hearing how raspy and unstable her voice was.

Nigel looked at her, the betrayal and grief in his eyes lessening somewhat to give way to concern. She clearly looked as hectic and terrible as she felt.

"Everything okay?"

"No. I don't know how long I'll be unavailable. In any case, I'll see you tonight at the hotel. I hope you'll be willing to talk to me and hear me out."

"I'll text you when I'm back," Nigel nodded, his expression a mixture of concern and bewilderment.

With that, Miranda texted her driver and left as quickly as her legs could carry her. When she was finally in the privacy of her car, she leaned forward, wrapping her arms around herself and taking deep breaths, telling herself everything would be alright.

What felt like an eternity later - Paris traffic during Fashion Week was a nightmare - Miranda strode across the hotel lobby, got into the elevator and went up to the last floor. Instead of going to her room, however, she continued two doors down to Andrea's room and knocked. Not two seconds later the door flew open and Andrea stood before her. Miranda's eyes widened as she took in the younger woman's appearance. Her eyes were bloodshot from crying, her breathing laboured, her expression of surprise soon turning into grief.

"Miranda? What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk."

"I think everything has already been said."

"No. We haven't said nearly enough." With that, Miranda stepped into the room past the young woman and sat primly on the neatly made bed.

Andrea sighed, closed the door and turned to stare at Miranda, arms crossed and her expression blank, if slightly angry. "What did you come here to say?"

"I'm sorry."

Andrea's mouth dropped open and her eyes widened comically, before she managed to get her expression back under control.

"What are you sorry for? For pulling me in and then pushing me away every chance you get? For giving me impossible tasks and never once showing any gratefulness? For making me suffer constantly because you're close but not close enough? For breaking my heart?" Miranda sat, speechless, as Andrea began to pace. "Or is it the fact that you betrayed one of your closest colleagues and friends to save your own skin? You couldn't have told him? You had to let him get his hopes up? Or maybe you're apologising for what you said in the car? Gloating about breaking your friend's future aspirations, and then having the gall to tell me I'm like you. Oh, oh! I know! Maybe you're apologising for dismissing me the way you did last night? All I wanted to do was comfort you, but _no_. You had to go and put me in my place for the millionth time, right? I mean, who can blame you? I'm just a stupid, fat, ugly, _useless_ _assistant_ \- "

"Enough!" Miranda yelled. Andy stepped back, her complexion paling somewhat at hearing Miranda raise her voice for the first time. "Please," she whispered brokenly. "You aren't any of that. You're intelligent and beautiful and kind and compassionate." Andy stared at her, gaping, not knowing how to react. "I'm sorry for all of it. For Nigel, for the impossible tasks, for pushing you away, for calling you all those terrible things, for being selfish and _stupid_ enough to think you're like me. You are a much better person than I, Andrea, and I admire you for it. The truth is, I'm relieved you are not like me. Being me brings terrible burdens, sleepless nights, and a devastating loneliness." Miranda blinked, not knowing where those words came from. She had never admitted to being lonely, not even to herself. But now that she said it out loud to the beautiful woman staring at her with surprised, rapt eyes, Miranda realised that she has been lonely her entire life.

 _Enough_.

Miranda approached Andrea, her arms extended forward as she reached for the young woman's hands. Andy looked down between them, staring with fascination at their joined hands, unable to believe she was touching Miranda's skin like this, that Miranda was holding her hands so gently. Andy's heart stopped when she watched Miranda's right hand reaching up to touch her chin and tilt her head up, and as she met bright blue eyes with her own, her breath caught. Miranda cupped her cheek delicately, caressing her thumb over Andy's soft cheekbone, making the young woman tremble with the simple touch.

"Andrea," Miranda said softly, looking deeply into wide brown eyes, lowering all of her defences so that Andrea could see the truth behind her words. "When I turned around and you were no longer there, I panicked. I was a mess, I was not able to think clearly until I saw your face when you opened the door. I can't lose you. I have spent my entire life hoping to meet my match, and at first I believed it could never work between us. But I realised that I could never regret giving us a chance, because happiness with you is worth anything. The only thing I would regret is never even trying."

Miranda watched as Andrea's soulful brown eyes filled with tears. Before she could even start doubting herself, Andrea closed the distance between them, reaching up to cup Miranda's jaw. Andy watched as the soft lips in front of her parted slightly to gasp at Andrea's proximity and soft touch. She watched, entranced, as Miranda's tongue peeked out to moisten her lips, and that was her complete undoing. Pulling Miranda closer, she closed her eyes and leaned forward, giving the older woman ample opportunity to move away. Instead, Miranda ran her fingers up Andy's neck and into her hair before pulling her firmly into a heart-stopping kiss.

 _Finally_.

Miranda was in heaven. Her skin erupted in goose bumps as Andy ran her fingers though Miranda's hair, and her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest. Her body shivered when Andrea ran her tongue over Miranda's lower lip, and she was unable to hold back a moan when their tongues met in a passionate kiss.

When they had to pull away to breathe, Miranda took in the sight before her, trying to memorize everything about the beautiful woman before her: the ruffled hair, the deep blush kissing her cheeks, her deliciously swollen lips, her eyes dark with desire, her chest rising and falling with quick breaths. Miranda was sure she was in a rather similar state.

"Stay." Andy said, quietly, breathlessly.

Miranda smiled, reaching up to tenderly push a strand of hair behind Andrea's ear. Her smile widened as Andrea's eyes filled with warmth, Miranda's own eyes crinkling at the corners and shinning with happiness.

"I never want to leave."

As Andrea pulled her closer and brought her into a deep kiss once more, Miranda's mark felt a wonderful kind of warm. She felt a weight being lifted off her soul at the thought that this warm sensation would stay with her for a very long time.


End file.
